• Having a solid company vision and a well-defined “why” are crucial when starting a new venture. It is imperative that you inform your spouse about this as well. Be receptive to your spouse’s queries, worries, suggestions, and ideas regarding your company.
• Clearly understand and have open communication about your financial situation. When I was fired in 2005, I was six figures in debt and started M & E Painting with the last $100 Emily and I had to spare.  However, she was not aware of our exact financial situation.  She actually found out years later when I was speaking about it to a group of business owners!  Communicate often, early and accurately over your finances, wherever they may be.
• Your business and marriage will only last as long as you do. I grew up in quite different circumstances than Emily did. Each spouse in a marriage will carry baggage, hardships, and hurts from their previous relationships. This baggage is going to come up in business as well. In my situation, I brought a lot of it, and I had a lot of personal growth issues to address. In retrospect, I see the detrimental effects that avoiding these issues early on had on my marriage and career. Focus on improving both your marriage and yourself on a regular basis. It will be very advantageous to your company.
• Will your spouse be a cheerleader or player on the team when it comes to your business? Decide if both you and your spouse will be actively involved in the operations of the business; or will your spouse support you from the sidelines and not be actively involved in the business? This is an important thing to determine early on.  This allows you both to establish clear boundaries as to how much your spouse will or will not participate in the business with you. Either way is okay, it is just important to make it clear.
• Recognize the language used by you and your spouse as leaders. What I refer to as your “leadership language” is how and why you act in certain ways, communicate, make decisions, and navigate life, leadership, and business. Emily and I participated in a leadership language survey in 2008 before heading out on a work retreat. We found great value in the data and insights the surveys provided. We learned more about our decision-making processes, communication methods, the reasons behind our arguments, our similarities and differences, and—above all—how to accommodate each other’s personal preferences. Gaining an understanding of these concepts has been essential to the development of our business and marriage.
• Understand your spouse and children’s Love Language. Gary Chapman, author of The 5 Love Languages, explains that people show and receive love in different ways.  There are 5 main ways love is given and received.  Acts of service, words of affirmation, physical touch, giving/receiving gifts, and quality time.  It is important as you consider how to connect and love on your spouse and kids that you take this into account.
• Remember life is business and business is life. What happens in one flows to the other.  I remember coming home after a long day, and a rather crappy one, in business.  When I arrived home, I could not leave what happened outside the door.  I needed to talk to Emily about it.  We both realized in this conversation that it is impossible to compartmentalize business 100% from life and vice versa.  It is completely okay to share your amazing top of the mountain days with your spouse, as well, your down in the dumps days.  We have grown closer together when this communication has been open.
• When your family expands and children join the picture, it’s critical to block off time on your calendar for your family. Set aside time for one-on-one conversations with your partner and your kids. Upon the arrival of children, your marriage may often get neglected and become your top priority. Make sure that doesn’t transpire. It’s critical to exercise solid time management as your family and demands on your time grow. Visit my video coaching series, Take Your Time Back, by clicking this link, where I offer a structure and a process for regaining complete control over your time and your duties.

Marriage, parenthood and business are three of the most difficult yet fulfilling roles in which you can participate in life.  They all converge in the most unique and challenging way.  I hope this week’s blog was able to help you with some tips to navigate the journey.

For more free tools on how to grow your business and advance your leadership, click here.